yesterday i was talking with my mother again.....i've been worried sick about her for weeks, but after she got her test done, it seems there may be good news afterall. the doctor who performed her esphogeal echocardiogram said that the leaky valve and swelling of her heart didn't look as near as bad as they were expecting. this is great news, but we aren't totally out of the woods yet. she has another appointment coming up, so i'm hopeful for that. very hopeful.
this weekend is my birthday.....FUCK!!! i am so bummed.....i do not want to turn thirty in any way, shape, or FUCKING FORM, ok?????? i know there are many people that would argue that i was being stupid, that thirty is not old, but i feel old. i miss being a kid sometimes!! i miss going to high school and skipping and having a bunch of friends to hang out with......and summer coming up makes me miss it even more. i know i can't go back.....and i am very greatful for having my daughters. without them, i'd really have nothing. but hey, that doesn't mean i can't go PARTY MY FUCKING ASS OFF, does it???? HEH!!!!!
tonight and tomorrow night start my birthday weekend...(when my dad was still drinking he had a whole fucking birthday week!!), so hence my birthday weekend. and i'm gonna tell you this: being a good lookin, not yet thirty white trampy blonde, i'm getting LAID.
i'm gonna try my damndest anyway.....
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